Perhaps

Perhaps I really not that good enough
Perhaps I really not qualify for this
Perhaps this is fate
Perhaps I shouldnt hurt myself at the first place
Perhaps I couldnt has anything
Perhaps I really useless
Perhaps others are better than me
Perhaps my work is simply not enough
Perhaps my fate had decide this for me
Perhaps I'm not that good in others eyes
Perhaps I'll be forever like this
Perhaps I'll be my stumbling stone forever
Perhaps I should be given up
Perhaps I shouldnt give myself any hope
Perhaps there is no perhaps, just I'm not suitable for it


Today, my mood is kind of complicated
I met something interesting
but th mood is still bad
I was feeling very tired
it seems like I couldnt move forward anymore
I'm disheartened
I'm cold hearted
Is it someone else cant see my effort
or I'm not good enough
I think that is not important to me now
Because I had been given up
And surrendered
I really felt very tired.....